I Am

I am...

• incredibly impatient.
• pretty selfish. I don't want to be but I am.
• I get angry at other drivers. I often yell "JACK HOLE" when someone does something I don't like. It's my way of not saying a cuss word. It's the first part of one cuss word minus the curse word plus the second part of a different curse word minus the curse word. I'm not proud.
• addicted to technology.
• grumpy when I'm tired.
• ashamed at how frustrated I can get at the people I love.
• way too sensitive.
• often distracted and not in the moment.
• stubborn.
• always right. At least that's the way I act. I know it's bad.
• overweight.
• a slacker. I have some goals that I haven't met and all I have to show for it are lame excuses.
• shy around people I don't know. I have a hard time being myself because I am afraid of how I will get judged.

Thank God for I AM.

Moses said to God, “Suppose I go to the Israelites and say to them, ‘The God of your fathers has sent me to you,’ and they ask me, ‘What is his name?’ Then what shall I tell them?” God said to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’”

Because I know I AM I am...

• forgiven
• learning to put others first.
• convicted about getting angry.
• saved by grace. I don't have to work to get God to love me.
• learning to be myself no matter who I am with.
• finding my identity in I AM.
• a way better husband. He calls me to love my wife like He loved me. I am thankful that she's patient and that I AM is making me better.
• confident that I don't know it all.
• a work in progress.
• loved.
• accepted.
• passionate about Him.
• reminded at just how much I need I AM.

Things You Learn On Bed Rest: A Guest Post by Monica Shepherd

Monica has been a trooper. She's pregnant with twins and is nearing the end of this 9 month journey. She's out of work and forced to lay on the couch for fear of her legs swelling up like an allergic reaction from a radioactive bee. It's bad. Since she has some time on her hands she came up with the following blog. Enjoy.
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Top Ten Things You Learn on Bed Rest


10. Bed rest was not created for multi-taskers or people with ADD.

9. Trying to get up off the couch after an hour of laying there takes about 3 minutes.

8. Daytime TV and late night TV are awful. Worst info-mercials ever.

7. Every time you attempt to drink while laying down without a straw, it will spill. Every time.

6. Trying to “hold it” for just a few more minutes to avoid getting off the couch is not an option.

5. 7 pillows does not make bed rest more enjoyable; nor does laying on my left side which everyone seems to think will cure everything.

4. People want constant updates on the babies, but there aren’t any. Still on the couch.

3. People call when I fall asleep, without fail. You can keep calling, I have nothing to do but lay here.

2. We have amazing people in our lives.

1. These babies are loved by our family, close friends, acquaintances, and near strangers. That is mind blowing to me.

3 Questions

People often tell me that they don't leave comments on blogs because they are afraid they will say something stupid. I get that. I often delete a comment 3 or 4 times before leaving it. I like the people who write the blogs that I read. I may not know them but I like them and I want them to like me. If I say something dumb they might judge me. But I get over my insecurity and I still leave comments. Here's why...

As a blogger I know that comments are like a blogger's paycheck. It's not easy to come up with content and when someone leaves a comment it's as rewarding as finding money in a coat that you haven't worn in a year. I love that feeling. I once found a $20 bill in my winter coat. It had just hid there for a year.

A blog is like a conversation. It's started by the blogger but it's continued by the readers. To read a blog and not comment is like having a one way conversation. I often will comment on a blog just to let the blogger know I was there. I put something like "great stuff," "that's funny," or "Love it!"

If a blogger asks a question I try to answer the question. It's the easiest way to respond to a blog.

When I do leave a comment I try to remember that I don't have to hit a home run with every comment. If I have a home run comment I will leave it, but I'd be consistent and hit singles (ie leave comments) then not even get up to bat.

So for the novice comment leavers here's an easy way to start. Answer the following 3 question.
3 Questions:

1. What was your first car?
2. Would you rather be forced to preface everything you say with the phrase "Tuck it in" under threat of being slapped, or
   have a magnetic head?
3. What is your current favorite TV show?

The Pain Before The Miracle

I am blown away by the love and support that people have shown for our yet to be born twins. I feel like they are rock stars. People genuinely care about them. Like in a stalk Facebook status for updates, buy gifts, clean their room in prep for their arrival type love.

I was reflecting on why they are getting so much love and I think it's because people have been apart of the journey.

The journey involved six years of waiting. It involved doctors telling us that we couldn't get pregnant without help and then getting pregnant without any help. It involved hearing a nurse tell us that our miracle baby was dead. That was the worst moment of my life. The journey involved multiple failed fertility treatments. It involved Monica giving herself shots with a gigantor needle only to have nothing come of it. It involved paying lots of money for in-vitro fertilization. It involved our first 20 weeks of pregnancy having multiple scares. A couple of times we were convinced that we lost the twins.

Now we are potentially seconds away from having these babies. Can you dig it?!!

I wish that we didn't have to wait 6 years. I wish we didn't lose our baby to a miscarriage. I wish that we didn't have to pay a boat load of money to get pregnant. I wish we didn't have to go through so many scares after she got pregnant. I wish it was easier, but then we wouldn't be experiencing a miracle.

If people didn't go through pain they'd never experience a miracle. A miracle is more then finding a great parking spot at the mall. It's more then having your team come back to win a championship. It's even more then a brand name for a gag nasty substitute for mayo.

Coming on the other side of this miracle is amazing, but waiting for it was hard. The Bible is full of amazing miracles. Reading through the Bible it's easy to forget how hard it was for the characters before their miracle. We know how the story ends. Every time you read the story of Joseph it ends with him ruling over Egypt. Every time you read the story of Job it ends with him gaining more riches and having a new family. Every time you read the story of Mary it ends with the miracle of Jesus' birth. What we often skim over is that before Joseph ruled Egypt he was in prison. Before Job got a second family he had to live through the news of his first family dying. Before Mary had Jesus she had to think about the potential of her life being ruined because her culture would have stoned her for getting pregnant out of wedlock. It takes us seconds to read, but they lived it out in real time.

Nobody wants to go through pain, but we wouldn't experience the miracle with out it. I know that someone reading this is hurting. I know that someone reading this is holding out for a miracle. It's not easy, but on the other side of your pain is a miracle. Hold on.

I can't wait to tell my twins about how they are our miracle.

Back Off That Ledge

This post was originally posted in November of 2010. My pastor tweeted that it was the best blog post he read that day. He tweeted something this week that got a volatile reaction. It reminded me that people need to back off that ledge. In case you missed here is once again "Back Off That Ledge."
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This post is not about basketball.

Last off season Lebron James and Chris Bosh joined Dwayne Wade in Miami. A huge over reaction occurred immediately. The media went crazy, fans formed opinions, and most people crowned them the next NBA champions. One analyst went so far as to say that they would beat Michael Jordan's Bulls record of 72 wins in a season. Currently their record is 8 and 7 and they have lost 3 straight. Now the analysts are on a ledge and declaring panic. The problem is that they play 82 games and we are a long ways from the playoffs. How quickly the analysts forget last year's Boston Celtics. The Celtics were not good last year during the regular season and yet they were one game (and an injury) away from winning the title. But this post isn't really about basketball...

Most of us live out on the ledge. We panic too quickly. We rush to conclusions. We climb out the window, stand on the ledge, and threaten to jump because it's just too bad. I've been there.

The problem is that most of the things we freak out about aren't really that big of a deal. In fact most of the things we worry about never happen. Think about it...what was the last thing you worried about? Most of the time it's hypothetical worries that consume us. What if she leaves? What if they don't like me? What if I lose my job? What if I fail? We create scenarios and then freak out about them. We create drama because we forget that the outcome hasn't been written.

Whenever I'm on the ledge it is a clear picture that my perception is out of whack. It shows that I'm overestimating my problem and underestimating my God. I overestimate how bad things really are or will be and I underestimate an all powerful being. The God who parted the Red Sea, helped a Shepherd boy slay a Giant, and even raised the dead is the same God who can handle our situation. What are you freaking out about? Take a deep breath and back off that ledge.

I'm hoping that the Miami Heat don't win a title. I'm a Lakers fan! At the same time I think it's too early to hit the panic button. We don't know how it's going to end. Like I said though...this is not about basketball.

I'm Too Sexy For This Onesie

We went on a pregnancy photo shoot with the oh so nice Barbara Spencer. Whenever I have my picture taken I can't help but sing "I'm too sexy" by Right Said Fred. I think the pictures turned out AMAZING! If you are looking for a great photographer check out barbspencerphotography.com. Enjoy some pics...

Pictured Above: Two of our twins superhero onesies. Love it!

Pictured Above: I can't wait for the twins to wear this onesie created by Alicia Futrell.

Pictured Above: Monica looking pretty. This is my favorite pic.

Pictured Above: My bald spot doesn't look as bad in black and white.

Running Sucks

I don't think I'll ever enjoy running. I started back in September and I've kept it up. I've lost about 8 lbs and I am up to 8 miles. Well, I did 8 miles once and I don't have a desire to do it again. Last week my friend asked me to jog a 5 mile trail. I like running with other people because it helps A. To keep me accountable. I wouldn't go a lot of days if someone wasn't counting on me to show up. B. I go farther when I jog with others because for some reason it helps me get past the mental blocks that I can't destroy on my own. The jog wasn't bad but I'm still feeling the results. The following picture was taken on Tuesday night...

Yeah that's gross. It looked even worse on Sunday night when it started spontaneously spewing some kind of liquid. On Monday it spewed so much liquid it soaked through my sock. And it caused me to limp. To quote myself...that was gag nasty.

Needless to say I think running sucks. Running sucketh (King James version of suck) for multiple reasons.

Running...

• is hard work.
• takes discipline.
• hurts.
• gets easier, but it never gets easy. Just when I think it's getting easier I up my miles or I hit another mental block.
• is better done with friends then by myself. A lot of times the only reason I jog is because a friend asked me or because I already committed to go with a friend. I also go farther with friends. I think it takes away mental blocks.
• affects your entire body. Joggers nipples...Google it. No wait. I don't know what images will come up when you search for that. Instead just click here. I mean seriously...what else can make your nipples bleed?
• takes time.
• costs you something. It takes time and it hurts. Plus you have to pay to have good shoes, jogging socks, and to run in races.
• sometimes doesn't seem worth it.

I don't think it's a coincidence that the Bible compares a relationship with God to running a race. "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever."

A relationship with God...

• is hard work.
• takes discipline.
• hurts. Jesus said to follow Him we must take up our cross. Last time I checked that wasn't painless.
• gets easier, but it never gets easy. I've been a Christ Follower for years and every time I think that I've got it down Jesus shows me another area where I need to work on.
• is better done with friends then by myself. A relationship with God wasn't meant to be done alone. We need other people to keep us accountable, spur us on, and be there when we are weak.
• affects the entire body. A relationship with God affects what I look at, what I say, and where I go. It affects my whole being.
• takes time. Just like it took time to get up to 8 miles it takes time to develop a relationship with God.
• costs you something. Actually it costs you everything. Jesus said "For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it."
• sometimes doesn't seem worth it. When I see people who don't obey God and seem to have a great life I sometimes wonder if it's worth it. Then I remember what Jesus said, "What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?"  

My Friend The Internet Sensation

I have a friend and we will call him Ryan. We will call him Ryan because that is his name. I've known Ryan since November-ish. After knowing Ryan for a few months he lets it slip that he has a viral video. He's been asked permission to show it on America's Funniest Home Videos and When Vacations Attack. It's a very funny video. Check it out...



So I'm just throwing this out but if I had a viral video that TV shows wanted to show I'd lead with that in every conversation. "Hi my name is Rob and I have a viral video." Since I don't have a viral video I will have to live vicariously through Ryan.

What is one of your favorite YouTube videos?

Mind Dump

My brain is constipated with random thoughts. It's time to free up some space with another Mind Dump...

• If our twins haven't made their appearance into this world by April 12 then my wife will have a c-section on April 12. They say that most twins come a month early. That was yesterday for us. So basically they could come at any second.
• So on Saturday night Supermoon appeared. After viewing the supermoon I tweeted the following..."I think special effects and superheroes have affected my ability to be impressed by supermoon. All it does is sit there and look normal." I must have looked at the wrong time because it didn't look any bigger then normal. Did you see supermoon? If so was it super?
• Twitter has a trending feature that shows you the popular things that people are tweeting about. It's why you will see people put a # before a word or sentence. They are either contributing to the trending topic or trying to make something trend on Twitter.
• So Rebecca Black became a trending topic over the weekend. She became a trending topic because she has made, what many are dubbing, the worst music video ever created. Many are wondering if it is even a serious attempt at a video or if it's a parody.
• If you think that video was bad you should check out this one. I saw this on Tyler Stanton's blog and it made me laugh.
• I tried to go jogging on Friday and I could only do 2 1/2 miles. For some reason I couldn't get past the mental block. On Saturday I jogged 5 miles. What was the difference? I jogged with friends. This is just another sign of how I need other people.
• Speaking of jogging...some friends at church bought me a GREAT shirt to run in. It says, and I quote, "Running Sucks." It's my first official running shirt. It's made out of running shirt material and is made by Nike. Love it!
• Did you fill out a bracket for the NCAA tournament? I did not. I like to fill out my brackets after each round. That way I can say I picked all the upsets. I kid I kid.
• Speaking of tournaments I am in the March Movie Madness Tournament over at educlaytion.com. I won round one and now it's time for round number 2. For this round my pick of the Dark Knight is up against Apollo 13. I'd love to have your support to try to win another round.
• Speaking of March Movie Madness I think I created an enemy with my round 1 victory. I was up against Tyler Tarver (who is a very funny blogger and I mean this in the most heterosexual way possible...a really good looking guy). His pick of Fight Club was up against my pick of The Dark Knight. After I won he tweeted "@robshep." So I tweeted back "@tylertarver." He then tweeted "Shun off. I am shunning you. Shun on." I'd like to win him over with my niceness. If you can make time click over to his site  and say something nice to him in the comment section. Then tell him robshep.com sent you. I'd like to get at least 10 + positive comments on his blog. Let me know if you were able to help me out.
• I had some Big Daddy's Kettle Corn over the weekend. If you live in the 757 and you ever see their stand then you should buy some. It's a bunch of yummy goodness.
• Have you noticed all of the commercial sequels? I guess these have been around for a while but it seems like there have been some commercials that have made one too many sequels. Just in case you don't know what I am talking about...A commercial sequel is when a commercial takes an idea and uses it over and over again. For example the "State Farm" commercial where they sing a jingle and then get a bunch of stuff. The first handful of these commercials were entertaining but I feel like they have made one too many.  For another example look at the Miller Lite series where a girl bartender asks if a guy wants more taste or less taste. When he says he doesn't care they say something about the guy wearing skinny jeans, or wearing sunglasses inside.
• Sunday was my nephew, Connor's, birthday. It's hard to believe he is now 1. I am so excited that our twins will be able to grow up with their nephew.

Whew...I feel better now.

Friends

Friends...

• Don't think less of you when they see the worst in you. In my case it's at the beach with my shirt off.
• Don't judge you for being different then them. In my case it's having a love for the Lakers and all things Superheroes.
• Celebrate when you win and don't get jealous. In my case all I do is win. I kid I kid...that's a line from a rap song.
• Can just hang out and not have to be entertained. In my case that's every time we hang out. I stink at making plans and I love to just hang out.
• Help you in areas where you are weak. In my case that's with fixing and installing things. I thank God for my friends who have installed my toilets, put together baby furniture, installed my wireless Internet...the list could go on and on.
• Get annoyed with each other, but quickly forgive. In my case it's a good thing that I have forgiving friends.
• Are friends forever if the Lord's the Lord of them. Um wait...isn't that from an 80's Christian pop song?
• Can get jealous when their friends spend time with other people. In my case it's because I hate missing out.
• Are more than a collection of people on Facebook. In my case I love having a lot of Facebook friends, but I am thankful for the one's that I get to live out their status updates and not just read about. 

I've been asking a lot of people who they hang out with. It seems that once people have kids they lose touch with a lot of friends. It takes effort to have friends and to keep them. I am thankful for my friends and I hope to be able to make time even after our twins are born.

Who are your closest friends and what do you love about them?

I'm Scared To Be A Dad

On Thursday we found out that Monica will have a c-section on April 12. Our due date for our twins was April 25ish. It kept switching back and forth anywhere from the 21st to the 27th. Now don't get me wrong I am excited as a 6 year old boy on Christmas morning, but I am also a wee bit scared. It reminded me of a post I did back in August. Back then we didn't know we were having twins, and we didn't know that one was a boy and one was a girl. In case you missed it here is a post from way back in August 2010 entitled "I'm Scared To Be A Dad."
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This is a HUGE week for my wife, Monica, and me. This is our final week of IVF. If all goes well we will be pregnant in two weeks. I want kids, so what I'm about to say may seem contradictory to that statement. I'm scared to death to have kids. To quote the movie "Batman Begins" "We always fear what we don't know." I don't know kids. I know babies even less. I want kids, but the following are some things that I'm scared about...

• Changing diapers. I talk about poop. Talking about poop is funny. Cleaning it up on the other hand is gag nasty. I'm scared to clean the poop.
• Not having alone time. I'm a people person, but I need a little bit of alone time. I recharge with alone time. Kids don't allow you to have alone time.
• Being tired. I don't do well without sleep. I get cranky. I get really cranky and then I get sick.
• Jacking my kid up. Every kid has a wound created by their parents, but I'm scared to create one in my kid.
• Kids music and TV. I tried to watch Yo Gabba Gabba and I wanted to punch myself in the throat. I don't know how parents put up with things like Barney, Hannah, and the Wiggles. I'd rather pretend that TV wasn't invented then watch those shows.
• I can't say no to my wife because I love her. I'm scared that I will spoil my kids, and that I won't be able to discipline them because I want them to love me back. I know it's wrong, but I'm scared I won't be strong.
• Having girls. I don't know how to deal with girls. I was a little boy once so I feel confident that I will be able to relate to a boy. Sports, action figures, and super heroes are all things I can relate to. Dress up, dolls, and tea parties scare me to death.
• Having multiple kids at once. I would like to have multiple kids, but I'm scared to have them all at once. If we do have multiples I would like to have my own reality TV show called "What the Flock!" My last name is Shepherd so having a flock of kids would fit the title of the show right?
• Multiple girls at once. Monica keeps talking about having girl triplets. No offense girls, but girls are drama. I don't know what I'd do with three baby girls. When Monica asked me what we would name the third, because we only have two girl names picked out, I responded with we don't have to come up with a third name because we can just let the adoptive parents name the third one. It was a joke...but not really. I'm scared of girl triplets.
• Having an ugly baby. Despite what people say about all babies being cute...it's a lie.
• Being spit up on. I'm scared of the spit up.
• I'm scared because I've never been a dad before. What I'm not scared about is having kids with Monica. I know her and she's amazing. Because of that I can't wait to be a dad!

How To Get A $52 Shirt For Free

I got a $52 shirt for free. This shirt to be exact...

Here is how to get a $52 shirt for free. 

Step 1: Go to one of your favorite stores to buy jeans. In my case it was the GAP.

Step 2: Pick out a pair of jeans that are 2 sizes smaller then the last time you bought jeans. Yay for me.

Step 3: Glance up at a little tiny sign that says "Buy Any Pair of Jeans and Get Any Shirt For Free."

Step 4: Ask an employee what that sign really means.

Step 5: In my case the employee didn't know what the sign meant so I'd hope for the same when you try to get a $52 shirt for free. The employee then went to ask the manager as I tried on the jeans.

Step 6: The manager comes to find you quickly because the sign was supposed to be taken down a week ago. She then tells you that because you spotted it she will still honor the sale.

Step 7: Now I didn't want to pay $52 for jeans. I was hoping for a sale. When I saw a shirt for $52 I thought I can live with a pair of jeans and a new shirt for $52. So step 7 is find a shirt that is the equal value of the jeans that you are looking at.

Step 8: Thank the manager for hooking you up with a free shirt.

Now if you follow these 8 easy steps it will guarantee that you can get a $52 shirt for free. Okay that is just a wee bit silly don't you think? There are no steps to repeating what happened to me. It was a unique circumstance.

It's funny to me what people try to put steps to. For example falling in love. People say things like all you need to do is be content with who you are and then when you least expect it the right person will come along. So when I was single I tried to punk God by pretending to be content. That was step 1 and I wanted to get married so I had to follow it.  Love doesn't work that way and I don't think that God does either.

I have heard people talk about God doing something in their life and then I've tried to copy it. After all I wanted God to move in my life. What I found is that God doesn't often repeat Himself. There was only one man who made an ark to escape a flood. There was only one Shepherd boy who slayed a giant with a sling shot. There was only one man who spoke to God through a burning bush.  God made you unique so why try to copy someone else? Your sense of you humor, your personality, your look are unique to you. So be you. Be confident in who God created you to be because only you can be you.

I think we are often so afraid of rejection that we hide our true selves and copy everyone else. God made you for a purpose and when you act like someone else you can't do what God created you to do. Be you. Seek God and live in confidence that He made you for a purpose. You are unique and cant' be duplicated.

What unique quality do you think God has given you?

Twins: The Sequel

Ever since I saw it in the movie theater I  have liked the movie Twins. Now when I first saw it I loved the thought of loving Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. At the time I was a kid and I wasn't aloud to watch any of his movies. They were all Rated R. I knew who he was and I wanted to love his movies, but Twins was the first one that I saw in the theaters. It had comedy, and a little bit of action. To this day I still appreciate the movie. Now I don't like it enough that I wanted to live it out, but according to the doctor we are about to have Twins: The Sequel. Actually the doctor didn't say that, but I said it after they told me the size difference of our twins and it made the doctor laugh.

We visited the doctor last Friday and she told us that our twins are 3 weeks apart in size. Our son, Hayden, is two weeks ahead of schedule. That a boy! Our daughter, Reese, is 1 week behind schedule. Fashionably late? Thus they are now due three weeks apart. I am still wrapping my head around this.

We asked the doctor if we should be concerned and she said, "there is no need to be concerned unless there is a 25% difference between the twins, and you guys are at 29%." Do what?! Doctors say things so calm, but they forget that we are first time parents. First time parents freak out about everything when it comes to their kid or in my case kids. When we questioned the doctors statement she said that we needed to watch Reese, but there wasn't any serious concern. We now have two doctors appointments this week to check on things.

I am pretty sure there is nothing to worry about.  On the other hand, no offense to Danny Devito, but I don't want a Danny Devito. His character was kind of sketchy in Twins. If you remember to pray for our twins, pray that they are healthy. Also pray for our peace of mind. Like I wrote, we are first time parents and can freak out about anything related to our kids.

Help.

Okay, this plea for help is not for anything serious. Now a days I have to be careful because everything my wife and I do gets examined through the lens of our twins being born. Just so you know our twins are doing good. In fact there is a post about them coming tomorrow. But now on to the reason why I need your help.

It's March and that means it's time for March Movie Madness. This is a movie version of the NCAA's March Madness. A great blogger, educlaytion, created the tournament, and I am excited to be a part of it. In round 1 my movie, "The Dark Knight", is up against this guy and his pick "Fight Club." If you love my blog, like my blog, or just don't think it sucks that bad then help me out by clicking here and voting for "The Dark Knight."

Just in case you need some convincing as to why the Dark Knight is great, here are 9 Facts.

1. Fact: Jack Nicholson was the greatest super hero villain in movie history. Until Heath Ledger played the Joker in the Dark Knight.
2. Fact: Superhero movies are hard to make good. There are more awful than good…Fantastic Four, Incredible Hulk, Punisher, Superman IV, Batman & Robin = stink!
3. Fact: The Dark Knight is not only the greatest superhero movie of all time it’s so good even people who don’t like superhero movies like it.
4. Fact: The Dark Knight is the third highest grossing movie of all time.
5. Fact: The Dark Knight is one of the all time greatest sequels ever. It is up there with Temple of Doom, Empire Strikes Back, and Terminator 2.
6. Fact: Heath Ledger won an Academy Award for his take on the Joker.
7. Fact: When you compare The Dark Knight to the awful movie Batman and Robin it makes you appreciate The Dark Knight that much more.
8. Fact: The Dark Knight is the first Batman movie to not feature the name Batman.
9. Fact: Christian Bale sounds funny when he talks like Batman and has inspired this ha-larious parody.

I Killed Your Mom, But Don't Worry I Washed Your Car

I didn't really kill any one's mom, but imagine if someone did kill your mom. Now imagine that they felt bad about it so in order to make it up to you they told you that they were going to wash your car. Now before you get too mad at them they are also going to detail it and put one of the good smelling things on the inside. Doesn't their effort make everything better?

When we make a mistake we often try to make it up to God because we feel bad or because we are afraid that He is going to nuke us. We try to make ourselves feel better by going to church, giving a little money to the offering, or buying Girl Scout Cookies. What? They have a good cause and buying those cookies makes me feel better.  I digress.  We believe that our effort will make everything better. If it's silly to offer to wash some one's car after you kill their mom then it's equally silly to try to do good things for God after we have messed up. How do you repay God for a sin that sent His son to the cross? You can't!

You can't do anything to make God love you more or less then He already does. We all deserve Hell and death, but because of Jesus we can spend eternity in Heaven with God. This is God's grace. I don't know anything else in the world that has a system of grace. A system that says you screwed up but I am going to pay the penalty for you and give you a gift that you can't repay. That's crazy!

I know that you mean well when you try to make it up to God, but it's kind of a slap in the face. Instead of trying to wash God's car after we have sinned we should fall into the arms of grace and allow ourselves to be loved by God. A love that propels us to not want to mess up, but forgives us when we do. A love that says despite your imperfections I sent my Son to die for you. A love that says my grace is sufficient for you. A love that says you don't have to work for my grace. I don't know about you but I love God's system of grace.

The Song Grenade Is Catchy As All Get Out And It Reminds Me Of Jesus.

Unless you live in a cave and were raised by wolves...scratch that...Even if you live in a cave and were raised by wolves you have probably heard the song Grenade by Bruno Mars. I bet the wolves howl that tune at the top of their lungs. It's that catchy.

Grenade is mad catchy and I hear it everywhere. American Idol - check. Grocery stores - check. Multiple radio stations playing it at the same time - check. Church lobby - check. TV - check. I think you get the idea. It's popular and it's being played everywhere. Oh and by the way I am kidding about the being raised by wolves thing. If you haven't heard the song then it's probably because you have more important things to to do then listen to pop music. I respect that.

After listening to the song for the umpteenth time I got a little emotional. The chorus to the song reminded me of Jesus. Read the lyrics and see if you can smell what the Rob is cooking.

Cause what you don't understand is
I’d catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Throw my hand on a blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I’d jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah , yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Oh, oh
I would go through all this pain,
Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for ya baby;
But you won't do the same.

I understand that Jesus probably wouldn't say baby, but I do think He'd throw in the yeah, yeah, yeah because it's oh so catchy.  I kid I kid.

I know that Jesus died for my sins and yet I often struggle to die to my sin. I hold on to my selfishness all the while knowing that Jesus took a grenade in the form of a cross for me. He went through all of that pain, and sadly I often find myself not doing the same for Him. I am reminded that I am in desperate need of a Savior. Sure I have been saved, but I am being saved as we speak. Even though I am a pastor and a Christ Follower I am still in desperate need of a Savior!

"In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood." - Hebrews 12:4. Think about this verse. In our struggle against sin we haven't done everything necessary to overcome it. In other words we are holding on to it. We are afraid of doing what it takes to die to our sin.

"Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." - Romans 5:7-8.  I praise God that He took a grenade for me.

Is It Wrong To Promote Yourself

I've been struggling with a thought. Not struggling per say, more like waffling. I'm not really sure why they call it waffling because waffles are amazing. I like my waffles with chocolate chips. Mmmm waffles. I digress.

Here's the thought that I've been waffling about...is it wrong to promote yourself? Here's where the waffle comes in...Jesus said the first shall be last and the last shall be first. I know that the easy answer is to say no you shouldn't. That's typically where I try to land. On the other hand if God has given you a message shouldn't you promote it?

I really wanted to speak at a local Chrisitan school. A bunch of guys from my Student Community Group attend the school and because they are seniors I wanted to speak at their school. I wrestled with whether or not I should ask to speak or just wait for God to open the door. I ended up mentioning wanting to speak to one of the guys and within a week I was contacted by the school. If I ever get around to writing a book I want to promote it. I often want to tell people about my blog, but I don't want to be all about me. `
So in your opinion is it wrong to promote yourself? Why or why not?

The Downside to Being Perfect.

So I had my yearly dentist checkup this week. My gums ended up bloody and I was told to floss, but I am holding on to 32 1/2 years with no cavities.

This dentist appointment actually snuck up on me. I normally start my going to the dentist routine a week or two before my visit. This routine includes things that I don't do on a normal basis. Things like flossing. My thought is that I can trick the dentist into thinking that I take care of my teeth. If I floss two times a day for a week I can get the bleed out and my gums and teeth will look good before the dentist sees it. Why do I do this? Maybe it's because I want the dentist to think that I am better then I really am.

I think most people admit that they are not perfect and yet most people also pretend to be.

What would people think if they knew your secret sins? How would your boss respond if he saw how you spent every second of your day? What would your spouse think if they could read your mind? What would your friends think if they saw everything you looked at online? Our reputations would be destroyed if people found out about the sins we hide, so we hide our secret lives and pretend to be perfect. We work really hard for a few weeks in order to fool our dentist that we are better then we really are.

I'm not sure that we are supposed to live this way. I don't think that we need to have full disclosure with every human being, but we should have it with someone. For example I don't think you need to tell the mailman about your addiction. I don't think it would be beneficial to announce on Facebook your secret sin. It's probably not a good idea to confess your sins to your boss. It would be silly to tell your waitress that you don't floss. At the same time we need someone who we can confess to.

We need someone who sees the real us and doesn't judge. We don't seek this type of relationship out for two reasons...

A. We enjoy our secret sin too much. If we really wanted to change we would. Sure you probably hate how you feel after your secret sin, but you'd rather pretend to not struggle then confess it to someone. If you confess it then you might actually have to change.
B. We are afraid that someone might actually see our imperfection.

The downside to pretending to be perfect is that you never change. Sure someone might judge you, but even if you were perfect someone would crucify you. Whether it's Weight Watchers, Alcohol Anonymous, or group counseling people who need help do it with others. Sure you confess it to God, but God uses other people to help you beat your secret struggle. Is there a Flossing Anonymous? I think I might need to find this group.

Do you think it's possible to have full disclosure with another human being and would it really make a difference?

I Can See That You Are So Stupid

I am gifted at seeing other people's flaws. In fact I am pretty sure that I have a super mutant ability to see the faults of others.  The problem is I am far too often blinded at seeing my own faults.

Two weeks ago I saw a grown adult throw a childish tantrum because I said no to them. After I kindly said no they pouted like something out of Toddlers and Tiaras. I then was attacked through email by a friend of theirs and finally disrespected on a phone conversation. When I got done one of my coworkers came over and gave me a hug. It was that bad.

Now I was able to not allow this to ruin my day because I chalked it up to them being spoiled and childish. It was easy for me to see their immature ways. And yet this week when I didn't get my way I shut down. I pouted. I didn't throw a tantrum, but I was acting childish. I didn't see it in the moment, but after reflecting over my actions I was being a spoiled brat.

I try not to be judgemental, but that doesn't stop me from seeing the flaws in others. Is that a contradiction? The bad parent at the grocery store, the Christ Follower who doesn't hold my same convictions, and people who wear fanny bags receive my fault finding thoughts. I wish I could see my own flaws as easy as I see others. I think someone influential said something about looking at the plank in your own eye before you point out the speck in someone else's. 

Fat people, a street beggar looking for money, men who watch the Bachelor, Democrats/Republicans, people who think Moe's is better than Chipotle, Celtics fans, people who wear Crocs, Christians/Atheists, people who have never seen Star Wars, blacks/whites/Hispanics etc., people with cats, homosexuals, ugly people, or someone else...who do you find yourself judging?

Potentially The Worst Decision Ever...I Mean Ever

I got to meet Andy Stanley, but this post isn't really about that. Now if you are a pastor or on staff at a church then I don't need to explain why meeting Andy Stanley is a big deal. If you are not then know that he is almost every pastor's ministry hero. In other words we have mad respect for him. As a pastor it would be the equivalent of a 13 year old girl meeting Justin Bieber, a stay at home mom meeting Oprah, a blogger meeting Jon Acuff, a movie buff meeting Steven Spielberg, a taste bud meeting the banana pudding milkshake from Chick-fil-A. Now before I got to meet him I made one of the worst mistakes of my life.

I went with my good friend Chad Johnson (no not the football player) to pick Andy Stanley up from the airport.  When we got there we parked in front of the doors right in front of a sign that said "No Parking." After a few minutes a cop knocked on the window and said, "can you give me one good reason why I should give you a citation for parking here." My friend explained what we were doing and then assured him that we would be on our way. This is where the drama started to unfold.

Chad said that he was going to go into the airport to wait for Andy Stanley, and he asked me to circle around airport until he got there. Now there are two things that are scary about this...1. I have an awful sense of direction and B. We were driving a HUGE SUV. I drive a Honda Civic and I'm not used to driving such a big vehicle.

So to circle around I had to turn a sharp corner, quickly merge into on coming traffic as the road split, and then quickly merge left as the road split again. Now after circling the airport 5 or 6 times I started to day dream. I started thinking about what I was going to say to Andy Stanley. I had to think about this because I have a history of saying stupid things to people I look up to.

All of the sudden I realized that I didn't merge to the right. I quickly turned on my signal, hit the breaks, and cut into the splitting lane. I wasn't going to make a mistake and mess things up. Or was I? I quickly realized that the correction that I made was actually a mistake. I had already merged right and now I was quickly leaving the airport. In fact it kicked me so far out of the airport when I turned the GPS on my phone on it said I had 9 miles until I could get back to the airport. Now to make matters worse traffic was awful. It was jammed! It was right at this point that Chad texted me and said, "he's here." Are you joking me?!

I quickly had a panic attack, screamed out "DEAR GOD NO!," and then took the first exit I saw. At this point I am sweating so bad it's spewing off my face. I turn the AC up as high as it could go and start looking for a gas station. After whipping into the gas station and asking for HELP I found out that I was on the road that the airport was on. After about 10 minutes I get back to the airport and pull in front of the door. After I park I look at my cell phone to see another text from Chad. It read, "He checked a bag. It's going to be a while."

So I ended up not being late to pick up Andy Stanley. I then got to ride in the car with him for about ten minutes. I didn't say anything dumb and I didn't have the guts to tell Chad that I almost royally jacked things up.

I think there is probably a sermon illustration in here somewhere. What do you think the moral of the story is?

So I Met Rev. Run

Last week I got to meet Rev. Run. I posted a pic of it on Facebook, but now here's the story of what went down.

I am a BIG Rev. Run fan. As a kid I fell in love with Run DMC. As an adult I fell in love with Run's House. Rev. Run's reality TV show is this generations Cosby show. Rev. Run is one of my favorites to follow on Twitter. In other words I am a big fan.

I was at a conference where Rev. Run was interviewed. I don't often set lofty goals, but my one goal for all of last week was to meet Rev. Run.

He got done with his interview on the main stage and was quickly ushered backstage for a web interview. I stalked waited patiently for him to get done all the while hoping for a chance to meet him. When he got done with the web interview he was quickly ushered away and I thought my chances of meeting him disappeared like Vanilla Ice's rap career.

I then went down a hallway on my way to find a beverage. I was hoping to find a Mt. Dew. On my way to find my beverage I saw one of the singers from the conference who just happened to be stalking waiting for Rev. Run to finish a video interview. After waiting 15 minutes they finally wrapped up the interview and opened the door. The fellow stalker I was waiting with quickly ran into the room. I didn't have an All Access pass. I only had a Special Guest pass. In other words I didn't think I had permission to be in this room. One of the staff of the conference quickly said "lets keep this door closed I don't want anyone else coming in here. I quickly walked out of the room because I was afraid I was going to get in trouble.

I waited in the hallway and once again thought that my chance to meet Rev. Run disappeared like MC Hammer pants. Finally everyone left the room and it was just Rev. Run, his manager, and his host for the conference. I went back into the room, asked him a question about Twitter and then asked, "could I bother you for a picture." He replied, "no bother at all." Little did he know.

The host that took my picture with the camera on my phone needed a couple of attempts to get it right. The first picture looked like this...

Now who would believe that this was actually Rev. Run? I asked for a second picture and he was kind enough to take one more.

Now this pic was a little blurry, but I wasn't going to test my luck and ask for a third pic. Rev. looks either hardcore or upset in this pic. I hope he isn't upset with the fact that I had to get a redo with my picture.

Babies, Farts, and Other Reasons Why I Don't Like Flying

I flew to LA and then back to VA this past week. It reminded me of why I don't like flying...

• They make it awkward when they don't give you the entire can of Coke. The stewardess or the male version of a stewardess asks if you want a drink. I say I'd like a Coke. They poor the can of Coke into a little plastic cup and then place the last two sips in the can back on their cart. Is it rude to ask for the last two sips? I don't know! Don't make me ask for the last two sips. Why can't they just give me the can? Give me the can!
• Flights charge for everything. It's already expensive but now they want to charge extra if you check a bag, want to load on the plane early, or sit on exit row. $20 extra bucks to sit on exit row. They also charge extra for wifi. Seriously? Everyone gives wifi away, but not flights. Instead of making me pay extra for the Internet why don't you just give it away for free.
• Delays. Without a doubt there will be a delay. For this past flight we were delayed because they were checking out the plane. Then without an explanation they boarded us. Then after we boarded they asked us to get off the plane. Then after standing in the aisle for 5 minutes they announced that someone who was trying to fly to Buffalo, NY, and was on the wrong plane. We finally left and I got home over an hour later then scheduled. Now that's not that bad except for the fact that I missed the Grand Opening Party of my church because of it.
• Unnecessary rules. Do we really need to turn off all electronics or is this really about them trying to control us. Don't tell anyone but I kept my iPod on the entire flight and we didn't crash.
• Smoke Rooms. In the airport they have entire rooms dedicated to smoking. I'm scared of that room. I don't really know why I am scared of it but I am. There is something scary about a room that is filled with smoke. You'd think the smokers would be in paradise, but have you ever looked in there. No one is smiling. They all look unhappy and everyone gawks at them because for some reason they put them in a glassed in cage like at the zoo.
• Airport Food. Airport Food is expensive, and unhealthy.
• That expensive unhealthy food leads to farts. How do I know? Well I not only smelt it but I also dealt it. I flew with a plane full of farters. The ventilation isn't great on a flight and when someone farts it sticks for a while. It's not fun when it's not you doing the farting.  
• Why isn't their a doctor on board? Flights should come with a doc just in case someone has a heart attack, a rash breakout, or gives birth.
• No one pays attention to the flight attendants when they give the rules. This concerns me because if we go down I want people doing what they are supposed to be doing. Oh and why don't planes come with parachutes? A cushion that floats isn't going to help unless I crash in the ocean.
• Lost. Have you seen the first episode of the TV show lost? I am pretty sure it's a reality show and on the first episode the plane breaks in half. 
• Lost Luggage. Whenever I can I try to carry on, but when I do check a bag there is a great chance they will lose it.
• Awkward conversations. Do you talk to the person who sits next to you or do you sit in silence? I once sat next to a lady who had pet rocks. She introduced me to her rocks one by one and then talked to them. This was before iPods so I had no where to go.
• The pat down. I am not sure why they randomly select people to pat down after going through security, but they pat you down without a reason. I asked the security guard if it was good for them after they patted me down. They didn't have a sense of humor.
• Babies. I feel bad for moms who have to fly with babies. I really do feel bad. But at the same time I feel that the airline should make a sound proof room in the back of the plane for all moms with babies. Either that or give people without babies a discount. I hope that's not mean, but on my flight to CA there were 2 screaming babies. I know one day soon that could be my wife with the 2 screaming babies, but I'd love to put them in a sound proof room so they don't bother an entire plane.
• I will give one positive. I do read a lot when I fly. I read a lot and reading is a good thing.

What do you hate about flying? Or What do you love about it?

What Can You Learn From A Four Month Old's Funeral

It's been two weeks and I am still thinking about the funeral I did for a four month old. I met with the parents the day after the accident and the mom kept asking why. Why would God take her four month old? Why would God allow this to happen?

After asking why over and over again the father spoke up and said, "God must of needed another angel." This was his attempt to answer why.

The truth is that God didn't need another angel. God is complete. God is complete and He doesn't need a four month old baby. That mom does. I don't know what your theology is or what you believe about God, but there is no evidence that a loving God would take a four month old because He needed another angel.

We live in a fallen broken world where cancer exists, people hurt others with their actions, and a mom finds her four month old dead because of an accidental drowning. I don't know why this happened but I know that God didn't need another angel.

As I was reflecting on what I could possibly say at the funeral I thought about if there was anything that I could learn from this tragic situation.  The only conclusion that I came to is that we are not guaranteed tomorrow. I often live like every breath is guaranteed. I treat people like they will be around forever. What I learned from doing a four month old's funeral is that I need to cherish every moment with the people I love because we aren't guaranteed tomorrow.

I'm Afraid

Maybe it's because I'm naive but I don't fear a lot of things that I hear other people fear. I hear some people talk about being afraid of dying, the economy, clowns, terrorist attacks, sharks, flying on airplanes, and speaking in public.  Now I am not saying that I live without fear. I just don't fear some of the same things that a lot of other people do. I am afraid of...

• Porta Potties. The look inside plus the smell is gag nasty.
• Cottage Cheese. It just looks like old lumpy milk.
• Lima Beans. I have shared this before but I've never eaten a lima bean. I have seen my sister choke down some in order to get dessert from my parents. Right before my first bite she puked back into her plate a green substance that looked like something out of The Exorcist. That was all I needed to see to know that I don't want to eat those things.
• Other people's babies. I am afraid of all babies, but with my own I won't feel the same level of anxiety holding them. When they aren't mine I'm afraid I'll drop em.
• Cats. I am not afraid of cats like some people are afraid of snakes. I don't see one and scream, but they kind of creep me out. When a cat jumps up on the couch behind me I get a little scared.
• Going bald. I am afraid of going bald. I don't have a good bald head. I have a speed bump on the back of my head. I am trying hard to hold on to what I have because I am afraid of losing my last few remaining hairs. Hold on guys hold on!
• Talking to people when I have bad breath. It happens...bad breath that is. I am very aware that it happens and I get afraid of talking to people when I think my breath stank and I don't have a breath mint or gum.
• People walking in when I am using a public bathroom. Everyone uses the bathroom but it really should be a private matter.

So that's my list. What are you afraid of?

I've Never

I've Never...

• Thrown up. I've never been sick to my stomach and I've never hugged a toilet.
• Been stung by a bee.
• Grown a sweet or unsweet mustache.
• Gotten a tattoo.
• Had to blame it on the a a a a a alcohol.
• Smoked a cigar, cigarette, or pipe.
• Gone streaking.
• Kissed another girl other than my wife.
• Met a pizza I didn't like. In other words I like all pizza.
• Seen Gone With The Wind.
• Successfully shuffled a deck of cards.

So that's my list. I tried to pick things that I haven't done but I think that you have. Now it's your turn. What have you never done that you know or think that I have?

Fashionably Late: A Guest Post By Josh Fowler

Today I have the privilege of having Josh Fowler guest blog. Josh is the type of guy that could sell a car to a blind man. He's passionate, funny, and a lot of fun to work with (Worship and Production Manager at Waters Edge Church). I hope that this post is the first of many posts for Josh on his new blog. Make sure you check it out and leave a comment telling him that robshep.com sent you.
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Well waaaaaadup! I felt as though I needed to say that, since this is my first guest post here at robshep.com. This is actually my first post in a really long time, on any blog, as a matter of fact. Who am I, you ask? I’m Josh Fowler, and I have the awesome privilege of working with the guy who writes this blog, Mr. Shep himself. Now if you’re a regular reader of this blog, your probably asking your self right now “self, why is THIS guy writing on THIS blog.” Here’s why:

Let’s go back a couple of months. December 1st 2010 was my first day working at Waters Edge Church. Right from the very beginning, I had a really easy time connecting with new people, especially the staff. Funny enough, Rob was actually the first person that I met from Waters Edge; we met at the Catalyst Conference in Atlanta GA in early October of last year. Rob and I really hit it off from the beginning. We instantly had a lot to talk about, and I could tell right away that Rob and I had very similar senses of humor. At some point after the conference, and after continuing to talk to the Waters Edge staff about the position they had open, it was decided that I would come up in early November to interview for their position. After I got back from the conference, and before going up to Yorktown VA in November, I figured that I would take some time to get to know Waters Edge as much as I could, including the staff there. In doing so, (and I’m not sure how exactly) I stumbled across robshep.com. After only a short time of reading, I learned that Rob was a pretty cool guy, was notoriously critical of movies, incredibly good looking (robshep.com may have added that last one) and was soon to be a dad. I liked what I read, and it seemed like the more I read, the more I had this recurring feeling of wanting to write a blog myself again.

Now there was a time when I was a regular blogger, filled with great ideas on many subjects. But like 95% or more of most bloggers (for some examples of other WEC staff or former staff that have stopped blogging click on the following...Phil Poteat, Bill Sprouse, and Jake Miller) I kinda let things fall by the wayside. In other words, I wasn’t consistent at all. Now I’m not gonna bore you with a list of reasons why, I’m just gonna tell you that I have a new blog, in which I endeavor to never let that happen again. Ok wait, that’s a little lofty even for me, but I can tell you that my mind is blowing up with amazing thoughts that I can’t wait to share.

Many of you in the past have asked me to write a blog, and I’ve said that I would at some point. But you know me; I’m always fashionably late to the party. I mean if you’re gonna make an entrance, you might as well do it right. That’s why I’m fashionably late, and that’s why I announced it at robshep.com. (Because where else would I announce something this cool?) Thanks for reading this far, and I’d like you to finish reading this post and actually check out my blog at joshblog.cc. Stop reading already! Go to joshblog.cc.