Babies, Farts, and Other Reasons Why I Don't Like Flying

I flew to LA and then back to VA this past week. It reminded me of why I don't like flying...

• They make it awkward when they don't give you the entire can of Coke. The stewardess or the male version of a stewardess asks if you want a drink. I say I'd like a Coke. They poor the can of Coke into a little plastic cup and then place the last two sips in the can back on their cart. Is it rude to ask for the last two sips? I don't know! Don't make me ask for the last two sips. Why can't they just give me the can? Give me the can!
• Flights charge for everything. It's already expensive but now they want to charge extra if you check a bag, want to load on the plane early, or sit on exit row. $20 extra bucks to sit on exit row. They also charge extra for wifi. Seriously? Everyone gives wifi away, but not flights. Instead of making me pay extra for the Internet why don't you just give it away for free.
• Delays. Without a doubt there will be a delay. For this past flight we were delayed because they were checking out the plane. Then without an explanation they boarded us. Then after we boarded they asked us to get off the plane. Then after standing in the aisle for 5 minutes they announced that someone who was trying to fly to Buffalo, NY, and was on the wrong plane. We finally left and I got home over an hour later then scheduled. Now that's not that bad except for the fact that I missed the Grand Opening Party of my church because of it.
• Unnecessary rules. Do we really need to turn off all electronics or is this really about them trying to control us. Don't tell anyone but I kept my iPod on the entire flight and we didn't crash.
• Smoke Rooms. In the airport they have entire rooms dedicated to smoking. I'm scared of that room. I don't really know why I am scared of it but I am. There is something scary about a room that is filled with smoke. You'd think the smokers would be in paradise, but have you ever looked in there. No one is smiling. They all look unhappy and everyone gawks at them because for some reason they put them in a glassed in cage like at the zoo.
• Airport Food. Airport Food is expensive, and unhealthy.
• That expensive unhealthy food leads to farts. How do I know? Well I not only smelt it but I also dealt it. I flew with a plane full of farters. The ventilation isn't great on a flight and when someone farts it sticks for a while. It's not fun when it's not you doing the farting.  
• Why isn't their a doctor on board? Flights should come with a doc just in case someone has a heart attack, a rash breakout, or gives birth.
• No one pays attention to the flight attendants when they give the rules. This concerns me because if we go down I want people doing what they are supposed to be doing. Oh and why don't planes come with parachutes? A cushion that floats isn't going to help unless I crash in the ocean.
• Lost. Have you seen the first episode of the TV show lost? I am pretty sure it's a reality show and on the first episode the plane breaks in half. 
• Lost Luggage. Whenever I can I try to carry on, but when I do check a bag there is a great chance they will lose it.
• Awkward conversations. Do you talk to the person who sits next to you or do you sit in silence? I once sat next to a lady who had pet rocks. She introduced me to her rocks one by one and then talked to them. This was before iPods so I had no where to go.
• The pat down. I am not sure why they randomly select people to pat down after going through security, but they pat you down without a reason. I asked the security guard if it was good for them after they patted me down. They didn't have a sense of humor.
• Babies. I feel bad for moms who have to fly with babies. I really do feel bad. But at the same time I feel that the airline should make a sound proof room in the back of the plane for all moms with babies. Either that or give people without babies a discount. I hope that's not mean, but on my flight to CA there were 2 screaming babies. I know one day soon that could be my wife with the 2 screaming babies, but I'd love to put them in a sound proof room so they don't bother an entire plane.
• I will give one positive. I do read a lot when I fly. I read a lot and reading is a good thing.

What do you hate about flying? Or What do you love about it?