Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Everything Doesn't Happen For A Reason Part 2

I wanted to clarify my earlier post a little bit.  I do believe that God is in control. I do believe that God has a plan. I believe that God works for the good of those who love Him.  I just don't believe that everything happens for a specific reason.  This post was inspired by a conversation I had with a friend of mine. He is a contract worker and his job has been put on hold for an unknown amount of time.  He doesn't know if he'll get paid in a week, month, or even a year. It's a tough situation for him.  When we met he was driving himself crazy trying to figure out the reason why this would happen.  This line of thinking led him to one of two conclusions...
  1. I've done something wrong and I deserve what has just happened. He didn't know what he did but he was scared that he had somehow upset God and God was punishing him. 
  2. God has done this to teach me a lesson. He kept wanting to know why God would allow this to happen to him.  He was focused on finding out the why and my concern was that it would lead to anger at God. 
Saying that everything happens for a reason can lead a person to believe that God caused the tragedy or pain.  Did God allow it...yes. Did God cause it...I don't think so. 

It would be like this...a parent buys their child a brand new puppy.  He does so out of love and because the child had been asking for one for a long time.  After a few weeks the parent decides they would like to teach their kid a lesson.  So the parent lets the dog out into the street and watches the dog get hit by a car. Now the parent wants the child to learn the reason but he never communicates that with them. He just hopes the child will find out the reason and understand.  The child then leaves confused. Why did my parent cause this to happen? Did I do something to make them mad?

I'm not saying I'm right on this matter, and one day I may change my belief.  I just think to tell someone that something bad happened for a reason is insensitive.  To my understanding I would say God works more like the following...

A parent buys their child a brand new puppy.  He does so out of love.  After a few weeks the dog escapes outside.  It wasn't on purpose. No one intentionally caused it to happen, but because of free will the dog ran into the street and died.  At this moment the parent holds their child, comforts them, and when the time is right maybe even teaches them about how fragile life truly is.  When the child asks why this happened the parent doesn't give them an answer. Instead the parent loves them through the difficult situation.  One day down the road the parent shows the child how they can learn from this awful situation. Even though the child is sad they find comfort in knowing that their parent is there for them. 

What's the reason for...
  • children to be born with birth defects
  • a man's wife and daughter die in the exact same week
  • cancer taking some one's life
  • a man working hard his whole life to be fired for a young up and comer
  • a young teen being sexually abused by a relative
  • a child losing both his legs in a mowing accident.  A few years later he and his mom are killed in a car accident
The above are all real life examples that I've been around.  My point is that instead of trying to figure out the reason we should search for God.  When we find God in the midst of suffering He gives us a joy that surpasses all understanding.  When we draw near to God He shows us how He can use the tragedies of our lives to make us stronger.  When we draw near to God He shows us how He was there for us in the midst of the pain.

7 comments:

  1. You are awesome for following up on your earlier post. I have been thinking about this through the day as well. I think I fully agree with your reasoning and your understanding.

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  2. Thanks Daniel. This is not an easy topic. It's one that takes a lot longer than a blog post to explain. Thanks for reading and for leaving comments. I appreciate it.

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  3. Thank you for following up and I agree with you. I think the key is Everything happens for a reason (the secular saying) needs the qualifier added to it:
    Everything happens for a reason, search for God, He is waiting.
    Thanks Rob for tackling this subject ... and turning the downer into something that makes me happy to know our God :)

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  4. If God allows and does not stop the incident, don't you think there is a reason he allowed it to happen in the first place?
    With Job, it was a test of faith, he allowed Satan to do whatever he wanted except kill him. Now he didn't inflict the pain, but he allowed it for a reason.

    Lazarus died, Jesus needed him to die first for a reason. Martha asked why, Jesus answered her.

    I don't think that God wants us to shy away from asking why. Job didn't get the answer he wanted, he got the answer he needed, that God was God his ways and thoughts were higher than his. Often times we ask for our own selfish reasons only to find that what we thought we wanted and what we got instead was just what we needed.

    I believe that what God allows has a reason behind it. He might not cause it, but allowing it means there is purpose, because if he has the power to allow it, he also had the power to stop it from ever happening.

    I believe that the verse in Romans is true, that all things that happen, work for good to those who believe. So we may not know the reason behind it but it is for our ultimate good.

    If you take the ultimate example for a reason to suffer, take Jesus. There was purpose behind his suffering.
    God brings his children closer to him through suffering. God even tells us to expect it and to count it joy. (1 Peter and James) Sometimes it brings us to our knees, other times like Paul said, the reason for our suffering is for us to learn to be compassionate to others that we might know personally how to minister to them.

    I am not numb to the grief of suffering, we lost a baby boy five months into our pregnancy. I do know that I asked why, I went through a grief period, but God grew me spiritually more than any other time in my life. Was that the reason? I don't know. But I believe the free will part that you talk about is this. How do you choose to suffer once God allows it?

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  5. Anonymous, you bring up some good points. I wish you would have shared your name. Like I said in my first post I do believe that some things happen for a reason. Other things happen, in my opinion, because we live in a fallen broken world. That's the reason. This world is broken. God allows some things to happen because we have a free will. He doesn't force us to love Him and He doesn't force us to obey Him. Because of that free will He allows some things to happen. If this were not a broken world those same things would not happen. Your comment made me think. Thanks for leaving one. Next time leave your name.

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  6. Referencing anonymous: I see the Romans verse a bit differently: "all things work together for the good for those who love God"- the only good thing in all of creation is the worth-ship of God; so, no matter how awful the situation, there is still the ability for that situation to bring God glory and show His true worth- if I handle it correctly...
    I don't ask "why"; i do ask "what next???", but not "why"... I believe fully that the awful things that occur are simply because of the principle of sin on this earth. God does allow things to happen that He knows will not overwhelm me and He does hold back those things that I can not handle; but overall, it's sin that is working itself out in my life, not punishment or lesson learning... there are specific cases where punishment or a testing is going on, but most of the time, i agree with Rob, it's just life and life sucks...
    I'm going through a divorce and struggling to be strong for my own 3 kids... today my sister-in-law was found dead and I had to break the news to her parents and my brother's step daughter (9 years old) and know that he is now alone to raise their 2 year old who will not remember her mother. It sounds so trite to hear others say, "God's in control and He knows what He is doing... there's nothing we could have done to overcome God's will in taking her life." Not everyone will agree with me, but I find no comfort in this thought. I do find comfort in knowing that, though this is a catastrophe that I can't see my way through to being the strong sister and aunt I need to be right now while being the strong mom for my own kids, God can be glorified in this suckiness if I allow Him to be my strength and love through me those hurting so badly.

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  7. Great follow up to the original post. Love the illustrations.

    Anonymous... If you read the entirety of Romans 8, you'll find that the entirety of the chapter deals with suffering and ultimately death in this life leading to our eternity with God. Some versions of the bible place the section heading as "Our victory in Christ". The working of things for good is referencing only that we will cease to suffer one day.

    The freedom that God gives to humanity to choose their own destiny guarantees that horrible evils with no earthly good will take place as people choose to shun God and be lead by their fallen natures.

    It's a broken world we live in... all we can do is try to bring heaven to this earth through our actions.

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