The Real You

This is a picture of how I see myself in my mind...

Who is that guy? Well, it's actually Jake Gyllenhaal. I don't know Jake, but this image is pretty much how I see myself. He is smiling and looks like a lot of fun. He has a great head of hair. He is muscled enough to wear a v-neck t-shirt. He looks like a fun, cool, and pretty laid back guy. That's how I see myself.

I was recently told that I am somewhat different then the picture above. Now what I was told was not out of a mean spirit. They weren't trying to hurt my feelings or make me feel bad. They had noticed something that had been going on for quite some time. As I listened to their description of me it looked more like this...

Now this is Shrek. Not Shrek from Shrek 2,3, or 4. That was a gentler less grumpy Shrek. No this is Shrek from the first movie. He's a big ogre. He has the potential to be lovable, but at the end of the day he is an ogre. Now that I'm looking at the pictures I do kind of resemble Shrek as well. I have a few more hairs on my head but I'm quickly going the way of the Shrek dome. But this post isn't about physical appearance. I digress.

It's hard to hear how others view you. It's hard but it's healthy. The truth is that I analyze myself a lot, but even with self analyzing we have blind spots that we just can't see. I wish it was as easy to see our faults as it is to see the faults of others.

It's like my eyes are made of magnifying glasses when I look at others and kaleidoscopes when I look at myself. I can see the faults in others so clearly but when I look at myself I only see a fraction of what's really going on.

Maybe that's why Jesus said, "For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. 'Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?' How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?" Matthew 7:2-4.

I wish planks were easier to see.  I've got not one, but two, eyes for seeing other people's sawdust.

I'm thankful that in a non-judging way I was confronted with my ogre like behavior. Because we all have blind spots we need help with our planks. Not in a judgmental way. Instead our planks should be yanked with grace. We need relationships with people who love us as we are but refuse to leave us as ogres. With God's help I'm trying to be less of an ogre.

Do you think that the image you have of yourself fits who you really are? Is it easier for you to see other people's sawdust while being blinded to your plank?