- The weather. It's so unpredictable. I don't need much of a reason to not run outside, but the rain, snow, heat, cold, or even a mild gust of wind are enough to make me stay inside.
- At the gym I find entertainment in some of the fellow worker outers. I know that's not proper English but I didn't know what else to call them. I get a kick out of seeing the old guy who wears khakis, and an Oxford shirt to run on the elliptical. There is also the guy who looks like a fisher man...including wearing a slicker, the Asian guy who does Tae Bo to stretch before he runs on the treadmill, and the guy with the ponytail.
- When I jog outside I am the entertainment for those who see me. It's like a scene from Baywatch but for all the wrong reasons. Slow motion and jiggly may have made a star out of Pam Anderson, but it doesn't work for me.
- It hurts. I ran on the elliptical for an hour today. I ran almost 3 miles. On that fateful day that I jogged outside I ran 1.1 miles and had 3.5 heart attacks. My legs hurt, my body hurt, and it took me 5 days to recover from the soreness.
- Speaking of hurting...joggers nipples. The fact that jogging outside is so painful it affects your nipples is enough reason for me to stay away. Seriously what else in this life affects your nipples?
- Just in case you didn't catch it jogging outside can make your nipples bleed. It's called joggers nipples and it's a real thing. Google it.
- The gym comes with a tv for me to watch. The time goes by so fast when I watch SportsCenter while I run. I don't get SportsCenter when I jog outside.
- The elliptical comes with a fan that has two settings. When I start to get tired I turn the fan on low. When I feel like I can't go any further I turn the fan on high. There is no fan when I jog outside. Sure I get a little grossed out because the fan is basically recycled sweaty air from the gym, but it's worth it to help me keep going.
- It's expensive. I hear people talk about things like iPods that work with their Nike's, emails that automatically track your progress, and shoes that make you feel like you are jogging on air. I'd rather spend that money on going to gym. At least my money comes with cable, air conditioning, and the chance to people watch.
- There is no great place for me to jog. I don't like jogging on major streets. It's not safe and too many people get to experience my Baywatch motions. If I'm going to drive someplace to jog I'd rather drive to thy gym where they have cable, air conditioning, and the chance to people watch.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Why I HATE Jogging Outside
Last week I went jogging...once. That was all it took to bring back to my memory all the reasons why I hate jogging outside. I can't remember why I didn't go to the gym that day, but it was the worst mistake of my week. I hate jogging outside because...
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This post was totally worth it if only to learn the phrase "jogger's nipples". Priceless.
ReplyDeleteI think you can get something called glide to prevent joggers nipples. Or maybe a sports "bro", as the bra protects nipples on women, I suppose it would do the same on men. ;)
ReplyDeleteThere are tons of other cardio activities to do, so why do something you hate, if you enjoy other forms of exercise (going to the gym)? The point is to do things you like and stick with it. After a while, maybe you'll have a Bay Watch moment (in the good way) and will try running outside again.
"What else in life affects your nipples"
ReplyDeleteThis is a loaded question my friend...especially for a mixed audience ha
I have trained and ran a half marathon, all outside, and never heard of or developed 'joggers nipple', but thanks to this blog, I have a feeling I know one of the topics of discussion next Monday night!
ReplyDeletei'd run outside ANY day because i can always hit stop on the treadmill and quit but if you run, you are forced to run back...and i think the expensive argument doesn't have any ground if you are comparing it to a gym membership...the nike fit that syncs to your ipod is 30 bucks...everyone already has an ipod and gym membership is durn expensive...but regardless...if the gym is your thing, DO IT cause the rest of the world is sitting on their rears
ReplyDeleteoh man, rob. hilarious post. but i definitely have a few rebuttals to your reasons for not running outside. 1. weather: it's SOOO nice to get to take in and enjoy the weather when running. especially if it's the fall or springtime. but, in the summer it's nice to REALLY sweat, and know that you're really working hard and burning extra calories. and in the winter, it's an adventure to endure the cold and sometimes the snow (i use to HATE running in the cold, but started liking it when i had to train for a marathon through the whole winter). 2. people watching/entertainment: definitely can watch people and things when you run outside. this is one of the things i love best about running in new places is seeing what the area is like and the people. 3. it hurts: that's a good thing! probably means you're working out new muscles or maybe even working out harder. the elliptical is a good cardio machine, but i don't think it compares to old fashioned running- in challenge or in calorie-burn. 4. joggers nipples: use a different shirt (the wicking kind) with as little cotton as possible. or use duct tape, that's what my hubby did for his marathon! 5. watching the tv- that's an ok reason, but i think i've heard or read that people don't work as hard on machines when they are watching a show or reading a book/magazine. just sayin. 6. expensive. NO WAY. gym membership is much more expensive than a pair of running shoes, which you have to have anyway to go to the gym. you do not need any of those other gadgets. and, you save gas money by not driving to the gym. 7. no safe place? not true. i was just in y-town a couple weeks ago and ran in my parents neighborhood, around grafton's athletic fields, and in YOUR neighborhood. plus there's that area behind the school and neighborhoods where no one would have to see you run (i think ghs uses it for cc running?). i'm sometimes a little scared to run there by myself b/c i'm a girl, but carry a little pepper spray and you're good. ok, my last little thing about running- it's the BEST b/c you can do it ANYWHERE. going on vacation? pack your running shoes! holiday, and gym's closed? put on your running shoes! feel stressed and don't feel like taking 2 hours of your day to DRIVE to the gym, workout, and DRIVE back>? put on your running shoes!!
ReplyDeletecan you tell i'm passionate about running?!?! not sure if you remember or not, but in middle school and most of HS, i could barely run a half a mile without stopping to walk. and i am definitely NO athlete at all. i never thought i could run a marathon, but i did it. so what i'm saying is, you can run, or jog!!!!
anyway, rob, even if i haven't persuaded you to run, please be encouraged that it is GREAT that you actually go to the gym and workout. any kind of exercise is a positive investment in your health and well-being.
sorry i wrote a book here.
and praying for you guys and the twinsies! so awesome.
bon
Bonnie, you bring up some good points. Maybe I'll try it again.
ReplyDeleteRob, I was gonna try to throw out some convincing arguments for running outside, but I've got nothing to top Bonnie's list. She's got it all covered. I will say that if you only do it every once in a long while, it's guaranteed to be no fun. You have to start slow / short and gradually work your way up to the point where you actually find yourself kinda enjoying it, and you feel some sense of accomplishment when you're done. The Nike + thing is pretty cool actually. And yeah, I actually did get a little chest irritation not long ago. Sorry, it's just too weird to reference my nipples on your blog, no offense. Just had to switch to a lighter-weight / looser shirt.
ReplyDeleteif your looking for a place to jog outside try the noland trail at CNU good shade and up to 5 miles
ReplyDelete