Easterrocks.com

The last few years a fast food chain in our area passed out invite cards to Easter with Waters Edge Church to every person who visited the restaurant. It was a HUGE way to get the word out about our services. Someone complained and threatened to sue the restaurant. Because of the drama caused by one person the restaurant wasn't able to pass out our invite cards.

The WEC staff put our heads together and came up with a creative way to spread the word. It's called Easterrocks.com. On Sunday we, ever so gently, placed cards with instructions on each car in our parking lot. The instructions asked that each person do 3 things.

1. Buy a window chalk marker
2. Write Easterrocks.com on your windshield (we clarified rear windshield just to be safe)
3. Write Easterrocks.com on your Facebook, Twitter, or blog.

We then provided markers for all of our Community Group Facilitators so that Community Groups could mark up cars together. This past Monday my group chalked up our cars during group. It was a lot of fun. Here are some pics...

Now ultimately we believe the best way to get the word out is by personal invitation, but name recognition helps people know the name before they get asked.

Easier

• It's easier to give advice than take advice
• It's easier to avoid confrontation than work through it
• It's easier to see the problems in someone else's life than your own
• It's easier to gain weight than to lose it
• It's easier to be selfish than to live for others
• It's easier to hold onto a grudge than it is to forgive
• It's easier to be lazy than to work hard
• It's easier to make fun of people than to bite your tongue
• It's easier to get depressed about one bad thing than to celebrate ten great things
• It's easier to do nothing than to do something worthwhile
• It's easier to pass the blame than to accept responsibility
• It's easier to live in the moment than to think about future consequences
• It's easier to ignore God than to live for Him

Why Accountability Doesn't Work

I grew up in the church. The term accountability was something that was talked about a lot. The idea behind it was great. We all have issues in life, and the thought was that having someone to keep you accountable would prevent you from making mistakes.

In my experience accountability worked for a few weeks. It was normally after someone got caught doing something they shouldn't have been doing. They would ask for accountability in hopes to not make the same mistake again. The problem was that after a few weeks the guilt wore off, they went back to their old ways, and then stopped meeting with their accountability partner.

I recently read a quote, from my former youth pastor, on Twitter. He said "accountability is when someone checks in on you. Community is checking yourself in" - Chad Childress.

If there is an area in your life that you want to change you've got to take the initiative. You've got to check in with someone. The truth is accountability doesn't work because no one can force you to change. Change only comes when you seek it.

Easterrocks.com

Easter is only a week away. Can you dig it? If you live within 756 miles of the 757 then you should check out Easter with Waters Edge. For more info check out easterrocks.com.

Easter with Waters Edge Commercial from Waters Edge Church on Vimeo.

Making Time

When I talk about missing out on something I often say I didn't make time for it instead of I didn't have time for it. Most people I know are incredibly busy, but the truth is we all make time for what is important to us. For example...

• I'm really busy but I still make time to watch TV.
• I'm really busy but I still make time to blog 5 days a week.
• I'm really busy but I still make time to read the Bible.
• I'm really busy but I still make time to hang out with my wife.
• I'm really busy but I still make time to hang out with my closest friends.

There are some things that I don't make time for, but it's not because I don't have time it's because I don't make time to do those things. They are not the priority in my life so I don't do them. The truth is that you make time to do what's important to you. Maybe it's Facebook, reading the Bible, playing video games, spending time with family, going to church, or investing in people, but we all make time for things that are a priority to us.

Why Women Nag

DISCLAIMER: My wife doesn't nag me. Ever.

I have a theory about why women nag their men. Women are way more complex then men. If you ever ask a woman how her day was you get a lot of details. When you ask a guy it can be summed up in one or two words. So here's my theory...when a woman asks her man to do do something she has a million thoughts going through her head. When a guy hears it he has one thought and that is whatever he is doing.

After five, ten, or fifteen minutes if the guy hasn't responded there is a good chance that he's forgotten what he was asked to do. After five, ten, or fifteen minutes the woman has had a bazillion thoughts go through her head. When her man hasn't responded she becomes worried because she's juggling so many other thoughts. It's not as big of a deal to guys because many of them are one track minded. The problem is when she nags no one wins.

Application for women: Don't nag.
Application for men: Don't give your woman a reason to nag.

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop [on the flat oriental roof, exposed to all kinds of weather] than in a house shared with a nagging, quarrelsome, and faultfinding woman. - Proverbs 21:9

Introducing Connor Shepherd

This past Saturday my nephew, Connor, was born. My lil bro and his wife Nicole are the proud parents of a 8 lb 2.5 oz baby boy. He's super cute! Here are some pics from his first day on the planet.

Pictured Above: Apparently moms in labor have to wear diapers.

My brother and I had a lot of fun with that.

Pictured Above: I have a rule that I don't hold babies until they can

hold their own head up. They are just too fragile for me. My wife

forced me to hold Connor. Truthfully I didn't resist too much. I love

him and didn't want to miss out.

Pictured Above: Me and Jon. He's going to be a great dad!

Pictured Above: Connor showing off his abs. He's pretty much the situation.

Pictured Above: I watched as my brother changed a diaper.

As you can tell by the progression I didn't handle it nearly as well as Jon did.

It looked like black oil and I couldn't handle it.

Pictured Above: Nicole, Jon, and Connor

Mind Dump

My brain feels constipated with thoughts. The following is a mind dump of all the random stuff going on in my head.

• I had the privilege of baptizing 30 people at Waters Edge on Sunday. That's 48 people in two weeks. Baptism is an outward sign of an inward change. At Waters Edge we go buck wild crazy for baptism because is represents life change.
• The following is TMI. You've been warned. I ate Fiber One cereal for the first time on Sunday. My only experience with Fiber One is with their bars. Whenever I eat one it gives me awful gas. I was worried that eating it on a Sunday that I'm baptizing would cause me to turn the baptism pool into a hot tub. Farts bubble under water. Luckily for me the gas attacked after I got home from church.
• My lil bro and sister in law had their first baby on Saturday. Connor Crayton Shepherd was born at 12:23 PM. He weighed 8 lbs 2.5 oz. He's cute. Come back tomorrow for pictures.
• I got to spend time with my in laws over the weekend. It was a short trip, but I enjoyed seeing everyone. I really enjoyed seeing my aunt in law, Nancy. She's a faithful reader to robshep.com. She told me she really likes the "Mind Dump," so this one is dedicated to her.
• I'm speaking in a youth class at Liberty University on Friday. It's Youth Emphasis week and they bring in youth pastors to talk to the students. I'm bringing two of my students with me.
• Kansas jacked up almost every one's brackets. I didn't fill out a bracket because the Lakers aren't in this tournament. I love the Lakers! I'm very excited about the NBA playoffs starting very soon.
• The WEC staff got to spend some time with each other over the weekend. We don't get to hang out with all our families very often. When we do it's a lot of fun.
• The Blind Side comes out on DVD today. I pre-purchased it back in Jan. It was one of my favorite movies of last year.
• Whatever happened to Hubba Bubba Bubble Gum? Whenever I ask someone for gum I always get something minty fresh. Some of it's so strong I feel like I'm chewing on my dentist. I can tell by chewing on it my teeth are getting whiter, but it's not enjoyable.
• Just so you know I've never actually chewed on my dentist.
• Random fact about my teeth: I'm 31 years old and I've never had a cavity.

Whew I feel better now.

I'm Not A Nice Person

I try to be a nice person. I've even heard people describe me as a nice guy. It may seem that way on the outside but there are a handful of things that show I'm just not that nice.

• I hang up on telemarketers. I used to feel bad for them because their job stinks, but then they just kept harassing me. If you call me Mr. Shepherd, Robert Shepherd, and or you pause before you ask to speak to someone then I'm hanging up on you. Those are all signs that you don't know me, but you want me to buy your product.
• When I was a kid I blamed my brother for stealing one of my G.I. Joes. I found it right before my parents started spanking him. Even though I found it I still let them spank him.
• I kill bugs in my house. Until recently I thought everyone did this. I'm meeting more and more people who will actually catch a bug in their house and take it outside. Not me. I don't feel sorry for the lil guys. If you trespass in my house you will die...bugs that is.
• I get really impatient with people while I drive. I try not to cuss and I've only said one cuss word in the last 21 years of my life. However, I have been known to say substitutes for cuss words. If someone upsets me my word of choice is Jack hole. I don't know why I started saying it. Sometimes I just call them Jack. I'm basically taking the proper name of a donkey and mixing it with hole. It's like the beginning and end of two separate cuss words without the actual cuss word. I'm not proud...it's just what I do.
• I'm a people person, but there are times when I will walk the other way so I don't have to talk to some people. I know it's not nice. Most the time I don't do it, but there are times when I pretend to not see someone.
• I openly share my opinion to people who like movies that I think are rubbish. I don't mean to be a jerk about it. I know my taste in movies isn't the end all, but I just can't stop myself.
• I once squirted random people with Super Soakers from the back of a station wagon with my best friend Chad (not the football player) Johnson.
• I laugh when people fall.

You see, I'm not a nice person. I'm thankful that I don't get to Heaven based on being nice. God doesn't love me because I'm nice or not. He loves me despite of it. In fact He makes me want to love better which in turn makes me nicer. I'm still going to kill insects in my house.

How'd You Find robshep.com

Thanks for taking the time to read robshep.com. Some of you read because you are friends of mine. Others read because you go to Waters Edge Church. Some of you have blogs of your own and we have met via the world wide web. There is one last group of people who read robshep.com. It's the people who stumble across my site via a google or web search. Some pretty funny searches have led people to robshep.com. Here are some of the recent searches that led people here.

• 50 Reasons Why I Don't Sleep - I've never posted on this but it is getting me a canyon full of web traffic. I think it's stemmed from the post I did about 50 Reasons Why I Don't Own a Pet.
• 50 Reasons Why I Don't Own A Pet - I'm not sure why anyone would search the world wide web for this, but apparently a lot of people are.
• Is Chili Soup - Who knew this was such a popular debate? I posted this question on November 28 and it's still getting web traffic.
• Stu Hodges on Twitter - Many a people are searching for my lead pastor on Twitter.
• What Does A Possum On A Gum Bush Mean - You've got me? I've never posted on this, but thanks for stopping by.
• Kelly Surveyed 10 of Her Friends. She Asked Them What Their Favorite Pet Was. Two People Said Rabbits, Three People Said Cats - I guess they got here because of my pet post. I'm just wondering if I should called Guinness Book of World Records because that was the longest keyword search in the history of the Internet.
• Something Beautiful To Touch Me Married - I guess this is an ok thing to search for if you are married, but I'm scared. One of my favorite songs by NeedtoBreathe has the line "I just want something beautiful to touch me" but I don't think it's talking about another person.
• Robshep.com Clay Aiken - I once got semi attacked in the comment section by some Claymates (Clay Aiken fans). For the record I have nothing but love for the former runner up to American Idol.
• Prayer For Wrestlers - Back in March of 2009 I did a post on Wrestling. Apparently wrestling fans are big time Internet users because it sends a lot of people my way.

Benefit of the doubt

Do you give people the benefit of the doubt? How do you respond when someone cancels plans, talks behind your back, says one thing but seems to do another? All of those deserve a frustrated response, but is there a chance the person who wronged you didn't do anything wrong?

I heard Andy Stanley, pastor and author, say something to the affect that married couples who give each other the benefit of the doubt are more likely to stay together. That's not a direct quote. His point was that in relationships when someone hurts you it's easy to jump to conclusions and assume that they meant to hurt you. On the other hand the healthiest relationships give one another the benefit of the doubt.

The next time someone doesn't meet your expectations try giving them the benefit of the doubt before you pass judgement. Maybe they are in the wrong or maybe there's a reasonable explanation. Life is too short to get mad all time. Giving someone the benefit of the doubt will allow you to discuss it with them before you trash them. Most likely if it's someone you love they will have a reasonable explanation.

Movie Review: Remember Me

Remember me is not a movie I would have seen if I wasn't married. It was my wife's movie of choice for our date on Tuesday night. The last time she took me to a movie starring Robert Pattinson he sparkled in the sun and wanted to drink other people's blood. It was the sequel to Twilight and I wanted to gauge my eyes out.

This go around with Robert Pattinson was much different. Remember Me is moody, interesting, at times funny, and it includes a twist. One thing that impressed me was how the main characters pulled off their American accents. Not all good actors can pull off a respectable accent...aka Kevin Costner in "Robin Hood Prince of Thieves."

My wife really liked this movie! I on the other hand liked it but didn't love it. It's truly a sad movie. Not sad in the "Notebook" or "Walk to Remember" kind of way. More in a depressing, sad from the get go, and all life is meaningless kind of way. I give it one thumb up. It's rated PG-13 for a handful of swears (including the F bomb), and two sex scenes (no nudity is shown).

Rob's Rating System: Two Thumbs up = I loved it, worth paying full price, and I will own it on DVD.
One Thumb up = An OK movie, worth a matinee showing, and I may buy it on DVD if I see it in the $5 bin.
Thumb to the side = Wait and rent it. I wouldn't be mad if someone gave me this DVD, but I wouldn't buy it.
Thumbs down = I hated it, wish I wouldn't have wasted money on it, wouldn't own it on DVD

Superman

Movies fit into a few select genres. There's the action flick, and the chick flick. There's drama and comedy. There's kids movies and horror movies. Almost every movie fits into one of those categories. In the late 90's and early 2000's a new genre emerged...The Super Hero Movie.

There have been super hero movies for years, but it wasn't until the end of the 90's where we had multiple super hero movies coming out each year. Like with every genre there are great super hero movies and awful ones. For every Bryan Singer X-Men 2 there is a Bryan Singer Superman. For every Spiderman 1 & 2 there is a Spiderman 3. For every Iron Man there is the Incredible Hulk. Don't even get me started on how bad the movie Batman and Robin is. Side note: Batman and Robin was so bad it almost single handily killed the super hero genre. Many people attribute the movie Blade with reviving the genre.

Recently fans of the super hero genre became giddy when it was announced that Christopher Nolan (Director of Batman Begins and the Dark Knight) was going to revive the Superman franchise. It doesn't look like he will direct the film but it's going to be written by David Goyer, the writer of the Dark Knight and the Blade trilogy. Being a big Superman fan this makes me very excited!

Mind Dump

My brain feels constipated with thoughts. The following is a mind dump of all the random stuff going on in my head.

• Took the WEC Students to Leadership Rocks over the weekend. 11 of our 50 students became Christ Followers!
• We celebrated baptism yesterday at Waters Edge. I had the privilege of baptizing 18 people yesterday. For some reason I kept getting a brain fart right before I asked each person the following two questions 1. Have you asked Jesus to be your personal Lord and Savior 2. Do you commit to follow Him all the days of your life. I jacked it up in multiple services. One hour for the second questions I said something like, "Is it your honor to honor God all the days of your life."
• Most the time I'm not at a loss for words, but when it happens it puts a sickness in my stomach. I'm sure I'm going to get joked on for the honor to honor line.
• My wife has been sick since Thursday. I think she has the Bubonic Plague. Apparently it's really hard to get rid of bubons because she can't kick it.
• It's March...that means it's March Madness time for college basketball. Can the Lakers win the NCAA championship?
• Going to see Remember Me tomorrow night with the wife. My last experience with a Robert Pattinson film didn't go so well. The dude sparkled in the sunlight! I've heard good things about this movie though. Look for the review later this week.
• How does someone get added to the suggestions on a google search? You know when you start to type in something in Google it tries to complete what you are looking for? Well when I type in robshep.com it offers me robshelp.com. I don't know who that is but it makes me wonder how my blog can become a suggestion.
• Easter is less than 3 weeks away. I'm very excited about Easter with Waters Edge. Our services are going to be at the Hampton Roads Convention Center. We may or may not have come up with the sickest opening to any service ever.
• It's Girl Scout cookie time. The season to buy is over but my wife came home with a few boxes that she bought from some of her fourth grade students. Vote on your favorite GS cookie on the new survey on this blog.
• How are you feeling about this season of American Idol? I think a lot of people have talent but lack experience. But that is what this competition is all about. I'm enjoying the competition.

Whew...I feel better now.

Levels of Friends

Saying the word friend is like saying the word callipygian. What does it really mean? I have friends that I never call. I have friends that never call me back. I have friends that I haven't seen in years. I have friends that I tell everything to. I have other friends that I never tell anything personal. I think there are various levels of friends.

1. Acquaintance Friends = Friends that you like but don't make the time to hang out with.
2. High Maintenance Friends = Friends that you are close to but you can only take them in doses.
3. Cyber Friends = Friends that either you stalk or they stalk you via Facebook, Blog, or Twitter. This is a person who is a friend according to the world wide web, but you don't have a relationship with outside of Cyberspace.
4. Frenemy also spelled Frienemy = Friends that talk poo behind your back. You still get along with them but they will throw you under the bus when it drives by.
5. Best Friends = Friends that you are closest too. This is probably a friend who is interested in things you are interested in because you are interested in them. These are my friends who ask about the Lakers when they don't give a rip about basketball. These are my friends who call just to say what's up. These are the friends that you can hang out with and not do anything. These are the friends who love you but aren't afraid to speak truth into your life.
6. Need You Friends = Friends that only call when they need you. We all have them and we are all that friend to someone.
7. Friends of friends = Friends that you are friends with because they are friends with one or more of your friends. You probably wouldn't hang out with them without your mutual friend but you like to hang with them when you do.
8. Out Of Site Friends = Friends that when you or they are out of site you don't think about them. These are probably friends that live far away. Whenever you get together with them you pick right back up, but when you are gone they don't call.
9. Work Friends = Friends that you have because you work with them. You hang out at office parties and have work in common. Most likely though this friend isn't someone you spend the weekend hanging out with.
10. Spouse Friends = If you are single this is something you get to look forward to. When you are married you get your spouses friends. You better get along with them because your spouse cares a lot about them.

I'm thankful for friends...no matter what level they are on I like having them.

Tyler Stanton has a book

About a year ago I saw the following video by Tripp and Tyler.



It made me laugh, and that's not always easy to do. I like to laugh, but for some reason it takes a lot of work for someone to make me laugh out loud. After I saw the video I discovered their blogs. Very funny stuff.

This week Tyler released his first book. I haven't read it yet, but I plan on getting a copy soon. I'm predicting it's going to be funny. Here's a preview of the book. If you like it buy a copy here.

Everyday Absurdities Book Promo from Tyler Stanton on Vimeo.

Kick Them Out of the Church

I recently had a conversation with a guy who wanted me to kick someone out of the church. He was justified in his request. He had been wronged. The sin committed was ugly.

I shared with him that even though he was justified (the Bible even talks about doing this) if we kicked her out we would have to kick him out as well. When it comes to kicking people out if you do it for one sin then you've got to do it for all. I'm just not ready to start kicking people out of the church. In fact if there is a any place "sinners" need to be it's at church.

I think it was an eye opening conversation.

Grace is getting what you don't deserve. I don't deserve God's forgiveness. I can't earn God's forgiveness. God demonstrated grace when He sent His son to die on a bloody cross for imperfect people. I deserve to be kicked out of the church, but God has shown me grace. When I remember grace it causes me to...

• Forgive even when people don't deserve it
• Show patience when people fall short
• Be humble because even on my greatest day I still don't deserve God's grace
• Reach out to those that are difficult to love
• Resist the temptation to judge others
• Not want to kick people out of church

Nice Day For A White Wedding

Over the weekend I had the honor of attending one of my former students wedding. She was in the seventh grade when I started as her youth pastor. She was a part of the first youth group that I was the lead youth pastor. I'd been an intern and an interim before, but this was the first where I made all the decisions. I was in college and it was a great time of my life. I loved going to the wedding and catching up with some of my former students. Here are some pics...enjoy.

Pictured Above: Two of my former students have a son that is old enough to be

the ring bearer. Wow.

Pictured Above: Amanda, the bride, and her father, the Tommy

Pictured Above: The cake. I love wedding cake.

Pictured Above: Me and Amanda

Pictured Above: Two of my boyz from the former youth group.

Pictured Above: Rob with Billy and Stone Cold Austin Leeroy or simply Austin-Lee. I give a lot of students nick names and when I was their youth pastor Stone Cold Steve Austin was a popular wrestler. For some reason I tagged his name onto her name and then added the roy. It makes no sense but that's what I did. Both Billy and Austin-Lee have blogs that you should check out.

The Second Annual Robscars

The Oscars were last night. I'm glad that Sandra Bullock won. Being a big movie fan myself I thought I would celebrate my favorite movies of 2009. I now present to you the Second Annual Robscars. And the winners are...

BEST MOVIE I SAW IN 2009
The Blind Side

SECOND BEST MOVIE I SAW IN 2009
Star Trek

TAKE ONE FOR THE TEAM
Twilight a New Moon - I never saw the first so that didn't help, but in my opinion I definitely took one for the team. My wife wanted to see this so I gladly suffered through.

WORST MOVIE I SAW
Transformers 2 - I know a lot of people really liked it, but this movie was hard for me to sit through.

WORST MOVIE I DIDN'T SEE
Jennifer's Body - if you did see this movie I would keep it a secret.

MOVIE THAT DESTROYED EVERYTHING I KNOW AND LOVE ABOUT G.I. JOE
G.I. Joe the Rise of Cobra

BEST ANIMATED MOVIE
Up - I loved this movie

MOVIE I DIDN'T SEE BUT I STILL QUESTIONED THE NEED FOR A SEQUEL
The Final Destination

BEST COMEDY
The Proposal

BEST VISUAL MOVIE OF ALL TIME WITH THE SAME PLOT AS DANCES WITH WOLVES, FERNGULLY, AND OR POCAHONTAS
Avatar

OSCAR WINNER THAT I SAW BECAUSE IT WAS NOMINATED, BUT I JUST DIDN'T GET WHAT ALL THE FUSS WAS ABOUT
The Hurt Locker

Things I Just Don't Understand

• The lyrics to Smooth Criminal by Michael Jackson. I don't have a fat clue what he says in parts of that song.
• Why people leave comments joking on a spelling mistake I've made on Twitter or Facebook. I'm not a good speller. It's a weakness. Show me a little grace.
• Why there is so much space around the door of a public bathroom stall. I don't want to see people through the crack in the side of the door and I certainly don't want them to see me. Was it really that much more expensive to make a door that almost went to the ground and that didn't have a space on the sides?
• Why people talk while going to the bathroom. What happens in there is private. I try to keep all of my talking to before and after I take care of business.
• Why we are forced to take Algebra in school. It's so not practical. I'd rather every student take a course that taught how to budget money or balance a check book.
• Math in general. The Bible says that God is not a God of confusion. Math is confusing and therefore it's from Satan.
• Why people like The Bachelor. I get Reality TV. I get the drama. I just don't get how watching one dude kiss a bazillion different ladies doesn't hack girls off.
• Why the words live and live are spelled the same. One word shouldn't mean two totally different things. It should be live as in "Live with Regis and Kelly" and liv as in "Liv like you were dying."
• Why no one has invented microwavable popcorn that pops all the kernels in the bag without burning the popcorn.
• Why Americans don't call their language American. Have you ever tried to watch a show from England. It sounds nothing like American English. No offense but when we rebelled we should have renamed what we speak.
• Why God blesses me even though I don't deserve it.
• What they were thinking when they made the fourth Indiana Jones, Rocky V, and Spiderman 3.
• People who have email but never check it.
• Why we don't put deodorant on our feet or belly buttons. They can stink just as much as the pits.
• Why Facebook and iTunes change their layouts so much. I like em both, but I just wish I understood why they change every few months.
• How the news doesn't get sued for showing big butts when they talk about obesity.
• Why we can't tickle ourselves.
• Why anyone wouldn't like Papa Johns Pizza. "Better pizza, better ingredients" and yet I know multiple people who don't like it. I love it by the way.
• Why people say everything tastes like chicken. I've never eaten anything that tastes like chicken...except chicken.
• Speaking of eating things...why people say certain things have no flavor. I've heard lettuce, and water have no flavor. Really? They taste like lettuce and watter...that is their flavor.
• Why every magazine at the grocery store has an article about sex. On the front cover of almost every magazine is a line that says something like, "765 ways to improve your sex life." It doesn't matter the magazine either...Glamour, Home and Garden, Cat Fancy. Sure sex sells, but don't other things sell just as well?
• Why hair decides to grow where it grows. It should be simple...on the head = great. On the back = gag nasty.
• Why people don't like to watch old movies. Have you ever had a group of people over to your house to watch a movie? It's been my experience that the crowd will refuse to watch a movie unless it is rented or newly bought. Even if they haven't seen the movie they don't want to watch it if it's old. I've had people reject me on "Back to the Future," "The Fugitive," and "The Matrix."
• Why guys wear speedos.
• Why God blessed me with the mind to rhyme and two hyped feet.
• Why people didn't get that the last one was a quote from "U Can't Touch This."
• Why I fall asleep while watching movies. I love movies. I don't want to sleep during them but I often do.
• Why I think the word duty is so funny. Pretty sure I'll laugh if someone says they have..."bus duty, ship duty, multiple duties, or civic duty." It just sounds too much like doodie.
• Why people lie and say they've been cow tipping. I lived with a family that owned many a cows and they told me it's impossible.
• Why people follow me on Twitter even though I don't know them. I don't mind and I'm not saying that they shouldn't...I just don't understand. It's more that I'm just curious.
• Why there are so many things that I just don't understand.

What are some things that you just don't understand? Leave a comment.

Where is Chuck Norris

I don't know how people find out about stuff like the following...but I'm glad they do. Someone recently told me about what happens when you Google "Where's Chuck Norris." Now you have two options when you do a search on Google. 1. Google Search or 2. I'm Feeling Lucky. After you type in "Where's Chuck Norris" click on I'm Feeling Lucky and then see what happens. It's pretty funny. Or you can just click here. Enjoy.

In Response to Tues. Post

Apparently others have felt my pain when it comes to pets. Check out the commercial by Wade Blasingame, an attorney at law who takes dogs to court...



If that video doesn't convince you maybe this one will. This is a very funny video by Tripp and Tyler called "Things You CAN'T Do When You're NOT A Dog." Very funny.

50 Reasons Why I Don't Own A Pet

Now before you send me a hate comment, please understand that this list is supposed to be funny. I don't hate pets. I'm not a cold hearted hater. I just don't own a pet, and there are times when people give me a hard time for it. This is my humorous response.

1. I don't like to be sniffed in the crotch. I don't know why animals do this, but it is awkward and scary. I know that you trust your animal, but I don't. For all I know they could be hungry and that might be the reason they are sniffing up on me. Nuff said.
2. Animals cost a lot of money.
3. They eat or claw your stuff.
4. They don't know how to use the toilet. I don't want to have to bag poo, sift poo, or step in poo. All products of pets.
5. They smell. And people who don't think their houses smell like their pets are blinded by love.
6. When you go on vacation you have to find someone to take care of them.
7. They need attention. I'd rather spend my attention on my wife, friends, or staring at a wall.
8. They get sick and it's mad expensive to fix em.
9. They don't respect your personal space. They climb on you, jump on you, and try to sleep in your bed.
10. They hump in public. People have such double standards when it comes to pets. They want to treat them like humans but overlook the fact that animals will try to have sex whenever they want. They don't wait for an invitation or a private setting. If it's a dog they don't even care if it's your leg.
11. They shed. Fish don't really count as pets. Almost all others leave their hair all over the place.
12. If you want to count fish...they die after a few weeks/months. I'm still not over my fish, Hulk Hogan, dying when I was in the third grade.
13. I question their love. Anything that runs away the minute the door is open doesn't really love you.
14. They make noise. It's not like you can have a conversation with the noise they make.
15. They lick to show love. That's gross.
16. You can train an animal to play dead, go to the bathroom in a box, or balance a ball on their nose, but animals don't have enough sense to look both ways before crossing the street.
17. They could attack at any moment.
18. I like Garfield and Snoopy, but I've never met a cat or dog that acted anything like them. If I did I would have a pet.
19. Did you read about the pet whale killing its trainer when he accidentally fell in. Nuff said.
20. You feed em food made specifically for them and they still chew on your furniture, iPods, and children.
21. Poop in a bag.
22. At one point in history to call someone a dog was considered an insult. It's what Goliath called David. Now the dog is man's best friend. Societies typically go down morally and ethically. This may be a sign of that. What's next? Squirrels in the house?
23. Cat ladies.
24. When animals start to help pay the bills I'll consider owning one. Until then they just suck up money.
25. Jesus didn't have a pet.
26. Mad Cow Disease, Bird Flu, Swine Flu = animal attempts to rule humans.
27. Have you seen the documentary "Planet of the Apes"?
28. I don't eat humans. I do however eat animals. I would feel hypocritical owning a pet knowing I eat other animals.
29. I owned a rabbit once. Most rabbits run from humans. This rabbit clawed us, ate our electrical cords, and shot poop out it's cage into the next room.
30. I also owned a turtle once. His name was Michelangelo. He died and we didn't notice until we could smell him.
31. Science says we evolved from animals. Not owning a pet is my protest against evolution.
32. The movie "Pet Cemetery."
33. Satan took on the form of a snake. What makes you think he's not your cat?
34. Pets are addictive. Most my friends that have a pet end up having multiple.
35. I get my fill of pets by visiting the zoo.
36. "Cujo" is a true story.
37. Pet clothes. I know it's not their fault that owners dress them, but seriously...pet clothes!
38. People say that pets bring love to their life. People also bought Pet Rocks.
39. Did I mention Poo in a bag?
40. I'm really busy.
41. I like alone time. On my days off I don't mind some alone time. Animals don't give you alone time.
42. "2 hours of sleep and woke up to a house full of vomit courtesy of Daisy." - Direct quote from Facebook.
43. Have you ever stepped in dog poo?
44. We have a lot of guests over to the house.
45. I like the mailman and most pets don't. Actually I don't know our mailman, but if I did I would feel bad for causing him fear every time he came to my house.
46. Pet stores sell dogs and cats. They also sell birds, snakes, and rats. Smells like a conspiracy to get animals out of the wild.
47. PETA
48. I live in a town home. There is not a lot of space to run around for a pet.
49. Most my friends own pets so I get my full by hanging out with their pets.
50. Pets die. I recently had two friends have pets die. It was incredibly sad for them because they became a part of their family. I'm not good with goodbyes.

One Armed Basketball Player

I saw this story the other day and was incredibly impressed. Zack Hodskins is a 13 year old basketball player. What sets him apart is that he only has one hand. Watch the video and be prepared to be impressed.