Thoughts I Wish I Wrote Down...

I received this email/forward from a member of my church. Most of the time I delete forwards without even looking at them.  For some reason I read this list and it made me laugh.  I don't know where this one came from but it's a list of pretty funny thoughts. I wish I had come up with some of these. They would have made a great blog post.

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the world are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.
15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Bad Neighborhood" routing option.
21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
22. I would rather try to carry 10 over-loaded plastic bags in each hand than make 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
23. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
24. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
25. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
26. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
27. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate bicyclists.
28. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
29. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my last dollar everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
30. Have you ever jumped up during a TV Commercial and ran to another room to do something, only to get there and forget what it was you were going to do.
31. When I put something in a place I know where I will be able to easily be able to find it later, I have pretty well ensured that I will never find it when I need it.
32. It appears that we are all children when it comes to opening something with a “childproof cap”.
33. Do you use your cell phone from the kitchen downstairs to call your child, who is upstairs, to come to dinner?